..not me.

..you're right. i am not myself. because maybe there is never a constant self. maybe my new self displeases you, therefore i am not myself. not the self you want to be with. but maybe that is my self at that moment. and at this moment, i'm a different self. do you like me better now? God is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. we're the variable. we're the constant shifters.. unable to stay still long enough to identify a self. but we try.. and that's when everything goes wrong.

..i see a siren who've lost her song. a geisha who has lost her grace. an ocean that has lost her freedom. a bird captured and placed in a cage. where for should i proceed from here on forward. maybe every direction is the same. for one is not so different from the other. and this life is nothing more than terrain. is love so important to the flesh. is love the same for the soul. is love really love as we see it. or is love really lust in control? i am bleeding. bloodied by a slow death. i am hurting. pained with every breath. where? where can i go to escape this? how? how did i get here? why? why must i pose for you? so, let it be so.

..i'm letting go. the memories of pain. i'm letting go. aspirations of the mind. i'm letting go. the desires of the flesh. i'm letting go i'm letting go i'm letting go. everything. all alone. i like it better this way. as my heart shatters a little more every time. until i'm ready to go home. perhaps there is nothing in between. nothing for me. but maybe. maybe at the end, it'll come in time for my tragic hamartia. in pride of the soul.

..i believe in no edits. let typos be typos. let oranges be oranges. afterall, they're my typos. do you want me? or do you want an edited me? three slices of edited me comin' up. fresh pasturized plastic. enjoy.

strong.intelligent&lovely :: unforgettable.

[rei 03.05.06 10:41pm]